We all spend time in the shadows. They represent the dark periods of our lives. They are the places of pain, insecurity, uncertainty, perhaps depression, rebellion and even sin. While many dwell in the shadows created by others such as parents, family, spouses or friends, we all cast our own shadows as well. We live in the aftermath of  our own poor choices. We struggle against the darkness of our own making. And we strive towards the light, that which is good, right, and healthy. But moving our lives out of the shadows can be difficult.

Terry has spent most of his life living in the shadows. Raised in the Deep South, he was born the eleventh child in a family of thirteen children. His mother labored tirelessly to make a home for her children. His father was a hard man, a sharecropper who worked a farm to provide food for his family. Terry and his siblings were required to work the farm as well. This was not a childhood option. Everyone knew that not working hard would result in a rebuke from their father that could be physically painful as well as emotionally hurtful. He recalls how they used to work the fields together, sometimes singing spirituals as they labored. At times they felt like slaves. They had very little, and what they did have was hard come by. They were poor. One thing they did have was church, usually twice a week. Theirs was a strict, "God-fearing" upbringing. These were hard beginnings, a prelude to an equally hard life. Terry was the quiet one, the follower, the one that was most often forgotten about during shopping trips.

About the time when Terry turned 11 his mother passed away. This is a significant event in the course of his family. In many ways it was she that held this family together. Her passing left a hole in this family that could not be filled. His father was devastated.  He was a worker, a provider. But he had no skills as a nurturer, a consoler, or a caretaker. So he did the only thing he knew, he drove himself and the children harder with farm work. He was a wounded man however, and in his isolation and frustration he began to drink heavily. Realizing this spiraling pattern, the six eldest children left the farm to escape the inevitable abuse they knew would soon follow. They relocated in various areas to the north and invited the remaining brothers and sisters to come and live with them.

Over the next several years, Terry lived in different locations with different siblings. But even having left the southern farm and the difficult life it represented, he could not escape the shadows that the former life had given him. Wherever he was, "the follower", began to run with the wrong crowd. And it did not take long for him to begin to case his own shadows by allowing himself to become involved in small crimes and petty theft. Over the years, after having lived with several siblings, he had no place left to go, except home. He returned to the south, and his father's home. He found that his  father had re-married a woman who had seven children of her own. Terry returned to a house of strangers. By this time, the shadow of alcohol that had fallen on his father now fell on Terry as well. He began to drink and take drugs at the age of 14. Realizing that he could not mesh with this new "family", his father sent him to live with yet another sister in Boston. Drugs and alcohol could not lift the shadows that engulfed him, so he sought the refuge of a relationship. He married and divorced twice. He was seeking that stabilizing force of his childhood, his mother, in a marriage to older women. Both marriages ended, realizing more pain than consolation. Drugs became the escape that he sought. His addiction had turned to cocaine, heroine, and marijuana as well as alcohol. Then his father died, and he lost his apartment. He had reached bottom. He was now faced with the stinging reality of homelessness in the inner city.

Terry came to Boston Rescue Mission/Kingston House at the recommendation of a friend whom he met at a Boston halfway house. He came to BRM a broken man, desperately seeking to put his life back together. What he found was a community of care that allowed him to begin his life-long journey of recovery from addiction. What he found was a community of care that held him accountable for his actions and supported him in his new choices. What he found was a renewed sense of strength and inspiration to get out from underneath some of the life-long shadows that haunted him. What he found was spiritual guidance and worship services that began to heal the pain of his past. And what he found was that the God whom he had feared as a child was with him now as a God of grace, forgiveness, and love.

I sometimes wondered, Why me, Why Me? Why am I the only one out of 13 kids to lose their way?... God works in mysterious ways... losing my apartment was a blessing... becoming homeless was a blessing, it was an open door for me to escape the darkness that my life had become. I am just so thankful that God allowed me this chance to turn around. So many people never see their chance to change. Like me, they forget that God is always just right there... Thank God, I realize now that God was there all the time, He was always there for me, but I got so caught up in my own life that I forgot about Him. Thank God that He never forgot about me!

Terry has now transitioned successfully. He is residing in his own apartment, and currently works to supplement his disability pension. He faithfully attends his 12-step meetings and is working with our mens program director to see how he may participate in our program to be an encouragement to others who are struggling as he has.

I am just so grateful and thankful to God and to Kingston House that I want the opportunity to give something back, to be able to help to someone who is in need of some strength and encouragement.

Terry's eyes are soft and full of care and sincerity. His face cannot hide that he is one who has left the shadows and is now living in the light.

My name is Bill, and the wheels came off my life at an early age. By age twelve, I had already started using alcohol and other drugs. I guess I was always trying to fit in, hoping my self-esteem would improve. I don't know who sold me on that plan, because all my addiction did was ruin my life. I was homeless at 16 and the streets were my address. Before long I landed in prison for stealing cars and breaking and entering. Later, I did more time for breaking into an ATM machine.

During the few sober days of my life, I'd work in construction. Yet, to be honest, I was just a functioning addict most of the time.

Finally . . . new life Then it happened. My case worker directed me to Boston Rescue Mission/ Kingston House-where I am today. When I came here I was physically and spiritually hungry: Today, God has satisfied that hunger. One day I was asked if I wanted to pray the "sinner's prayer" and come to faith in God: I prayed that prayer, and that was the beginning of my new, better life.

If it weren't for you good people who support the Mission, I'd either be dead or behind bars. But I'm here...and I'm a living example of the success of this program-and of your dollars that keep helping lost people like me. If I could meet you I'd give you a big hug. I mean it. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for helping me see God's light.

My name is Jill, and this place is a house of miracles. Before I came to Kingston House at the Boston Rescue Mission, I was a drug addict, without hope and without the prospect of having a future. Today, I'm clean and sober. In my past life I was fearful of being mugged, robbed, raped or killed. Here, I feel safe, mostly because God has made me safe inside.

Small things are BIG things

Recently, I received a letter from my daughter, which read, "Mommy, please get better. Just stay there until you get well." That just about broke my heart. But the good news is that I am getting better, thanks to a loving God and a staff at the Mission that cares about me.  Even things like being able to take a daily shower, wear clean clothes and have my own toothbrush and toothpaste are gifts from God. Even a toothbrush and toothpaste are  gifts from God. Right now I need top be sober till midnight tonight...then to midnight the next night and the next. With God's help and the generosity of a donor such as you, I know I'm going to make it. Thank you for helping me...and letting me live in this house of miracles.  

My name is Howie. I graduated from UMass and was married for 22 years. I had a wonderful family, lived on Cape Cod and was enjoying my life. For more than 20 years, I dedicated myself to helping others as a licensed social worker for the Massachusetts Dept. of Social Health. Then it happened. I started using drugs recreationally. I became addicted to heroin almost immediately. Since I was making lots of money, I was able to "hide" my habit from my wife. I used the money from my IRA, so I never had to steal for my drugs. Even with all my counseling skills, I was unable to heal myself. I needed a higher power to help me do that.

For two full years, I was a functional addict. But during that time, I lost my home, my wife and my children. In the end, I lost everything. Then two years ago, I discovered Boston Rescue Mission and got involved in the programs designed for a person like me.I thank God every day for the people who support the Mission, because they've been instrumental in saving my life. My wife, Janet, sees that I've changed. There might even be a chance for reconciliation. I don't know. It's too early to say. Today, the desire to use drugs has totally gone. Relapse is not acceptable. God is giving me the discipline to see this thing through and constantly reminds me: Do not be afraid, for I go before you always.

Hi. I'm Randy.

My home life as a child was definitely not the greatest. I grew up with an alcoholic father who drove my mother and sister away when I was twelve. After suffering years of physical abuse, I escaped to my grandparents home and made it into college, but then struggled with the emotional weight of past experiences and began to drink heavily and use drugs. Two years later, my education became the first casualty of my new addictions.

For the next twelve years, I bounced between short-term positions and became increasingly dependent on drugs and alcohol until a tragic event left a loved one clinging to life. Ironically, the post-traumatic stress of that event sobered me and I then started and ran a small construction business. But because I hadn't addressed any of the core issues that drove me into addiction, I eventually destabilized, plunged into relapse, and smoked insane amounts of cocaine.  I smoked away a whole construction business before finally landing in jail.

Lucky for me, the Boston Rescue Mission had exactly what I needed. In the staff, I saw a peace and a concern about others that is completely opposite from the world of the self-centered alcoholic. Here I came to understand that Jesus is love; I was finally able to put my shame and guilt at the foot of the cross and submit to the will of God. I'm so grateful to the Mission and its supporters for teaching me responsibility and direction-a purpose, and a way to arrive there.

Hi, I'm Joe.  I grew up in the projects of South Boston.  After my father left when I was four, my mother had a daughter with a verbally and physically abusive man.  She tried to cope first by drinking, and later used oxycontin and smoked crack.  With her example, it became almost natural for me to drink every weekend at age 11.  My addiction just snow-balled from there.  By 16, I was using oxycontin as well. 

It was a crazy 8 years.  On the surface, I held myself together with jobs and nice clothes, but in truth I was barely alive.  I went to detox, but I never intended to get sober.  It wasn't until my sister and I entered the same clinic that I began to think about further treatment.  

I had no idea what to expect from the Kingston House.  I tried other programs, but never stayed sober for longer than two weeks since that first drink.  BRM was different.  I realized I was not alone in my recovery struggle.  Thanks to the Mission, I now am 8 and a half months sober, have an excellent sponsor, friends who truly care about me, and a healthy relationship with my higher power. 

I know that without places like this, we would all be dead or in jail.  Thanks to the support I've found here, every day gets easier and brighter.  I hope to stay clean and sober and lead by example for my friends and family still caught in the throes of their own addictions.

My name is Tina. My stepdad was an alcoholic. My mother tried to love me, but had no love within herself to give. We were very poor, but I was still a spoiled brat-always making trouble and wanting more. At 16, I left school, started shooting coke, and began prostituting with a much older man. Luckily I was rescued, but immediately found another abusive relationship. I had a son, and struggled through his childhood until he went to my mother's at age 9. Then I went crazy--like an animal let out of its cage. Men beat me regularly, and I used a lot of cocaine and heroin.

My heart broke when my mother died, and soon my son began the street life. Horrible depression took over me, and I relapsed. I smoked crack like never before and wandered the streets until finally I cried out to God for help. Then I ran into an old sponsor, who got me into detox and guided me toward the Kingston House.

What a relief to be here!  I've never been in a place that cares so much about other people. Now I'm praying, reading the Word, and having more good days. I'm doing it right-sincerely, honestly, and letting God do the work. For the first time, I've turned my entire life to God. When I need help, I can ask, and God responds. Then it's up to me, but this house will give me everything I need. I'm forever grateful that this house gave me a second chance.

Hi, my name is Linda.  Growing up was tough.  With my father in jail, and my mother constantly working, my four siblings and I grew up quickly.  At 16, I was pregnant and living on my own. 

After just four months, I lost my baby.   To cope with my grief, I turned to marijuana and alcohol, then straight to cocaine and heroin.  As soon as my 18th birthday rolled around, I was incarcerated for what was to be the first of 5 times.  My life became a series of cycles; sobriety, substance abuse, incarceration, and parole.  I gained and lost; three more children to the state, a brother to an overdose, and my freedom to the judicial system.  I couldn't find love for myself, so I looked for it in external sources. 

As soon as I got to the Boston Rescue Mission, I knew the cycle was ready to be broken.  Everyone is so positive here; it's like one big happy family.  There's a lot of honesty in our groups, which helps me to be honest with myself.  I wake up every day with a smile on my face, knowing that I'm not going to be sick.  Because of the Mission, all of my boys are back in my life and I'll be able to leave with a home, a driver's license, a good job working with computers, and a new outlook on life. 

My name is Elisio, and I was born in Puerto Rico. When my mom died, my whole world collapsed. With no one to look after me, I fell into drugs and alcohol. Nothing mattered. I didn't care if I lived or died. Not even time in jail turned me around. Once in a while, I'd decide to make a change, but I never had the motivation to stay with any program.

That is, until I came to the Boston Rescue Mission. Here I learned to talk about my pain and my frustration. They listen to a person here. When I arrived, I couldn't even read or write. Now I've got a driver's license, and am a supervisor with Boston Rescue Mission's On the Job program. Who would have thought that Elisio would have ever made something of himself? I actually am someone with responsibility. I can't start to tell you how good that feels.

What made the difference? It's been my relationship with God. I have a great respect for Him, and I thank Him every day for helping me to see the light. It's also the people here-and the love. They look you in the eye, and are honest with you. I needed that. I've also got to thank you for giving your money to keep the Mission going. You don't know me, but you saved my life. Thank you. For the first time in my life my future is bright. This time, I know I'm going to make it.

I know what can happen to a person when he's taken seriously. When someone truly listens. At the Boston Rescue Mission, they take listening seriously-because they've learned that it's the most profound way to tell others they love them. No one in our world-or yours-will ever fully develop and discover life to the fullest without feeling understood by at least one other person. Thank you for listening.

My name is Shawn, and today my home is Boston Rescue Mission-for which I'm grateful. My life got off to a bad start, when at the age of nine I started smoking weed. Before long, it went to LSD, Demerol, and finally cocaine. I had two heart attacks by the time I was 24. The doctor told me "Continue to use cocaine, and you'll die."

So I became an alcoholic. Not a wise move, but it's what I did. I'm now at the Mission, and I'm glad I'm in a place where I can ride out the demons that still live inside. My past is an old novel-shattered, tattered...and over! Now it's time to write a new script. And it's happening to me in the Faith Community program at Boston Rescue Mission, where I'm making a commitment to faith, recovery, and service to the Kingston House.

Something else. Whenever I see a donor who gives money, food, or clothing to the Mission, I know that God will pour out his blessing on those people. That's why I want to give a personal thanks to you for giving me a second home. And just as you bless people like me, I know that you, too, are being blessed.

Our names are Rodney and Ronda, and the message we'd like to share is that homeless people can succeed in life. Given a chance, they can strive for excellence and fulfill their dreams. That's how we feel about ourselves as a couple-and the place that gave us that chance is Boston Rescue Mission. For us, it all started out well. We met in college and dated for five years. We had exciting educational plans, but they didn't pan out. We worked hard, but we still never had enough money to make ends meet. We couldn't afford an apartment, so we would stay in hotels. In the morning, we'd go down to the lobby for bagels, muffins and coffee. That was our meal. Later, when we worked in

restaurants, we'd just sleep in a chair, or we'd sleep on the floor.

We didn't drink or do drugs. We were just homeless. Then we heard about the Mission. That's what saved our lives. At first, we participated in their emergency shelter program. Through it, we were able to get a good night's sleep and two meals. Eventually, through the case management services at the Mission, we were invited to participate in the Mission's Life Growth program.

Things are better now, but only because of the Mission and the wonderful people who make this haven of hope possible. We would not have survived without the help of

so many people like you who care. Now we are proud to say we have been blessed with

our own apartment. I guess the theme of our story is to never, ever give up on hope. God makes things happen for a reason. And again, I say homeless people can succeed in life. We just need a chance, and we'll make it.

"Homeless people can succeed in life."

My name is Tony. I am thirty one years old and am currently a resident of the men's life growth program at the Boston Rescue Mission   Being raised by a father that had very little time for me, I soon began to make myself feel better by way of money and material things. Due to a lack of spiritual values my life had very little meaning.

At twenty �six years old I was married with three kids, owned my own company and a single family home; everything that a person would want out of life. Or so I thought.
I was still feeling a void inside, a feeling I have felt my whole life.

Due to a back injury I was prescribed narcotic pain killers. I began to abuse them, taking three to four times what I should have been. I felt as though I had found what I needed to take up "the void" in my life. After six months of my doctor's care I was told I didn't need the pain killers anymore. What he didn't know was I was fully addicted.

I started buying whatever pills I could on the street. It became very expensive and tiring to feed this addiction but for the time being it filled "the void." My habit exploded when I was introduced to heroin. Being much cheaper and more powerful than pills I was in a downward spiral and didn't know it until it began to cost me two hundred plus dollars a day.

I began to sell drugs to pay for my habit. It wasn't long before I got caught and sectioned to a thirty day detox. That is where I first heard that a higher power could restore me to sanity, and I was insane, but not ready. Two days after my release I was high again.

I began to sell my material things one by one until I became homeless and had to commit petty crimes. Going in and out of every detox in the state, I started to hear about that higher power again. I wanted to stay clean but because I refused to become open minded
I continued to relapse.

I know now that I had a spiritual awaking, while in my last detox, a councilor said "believe that I believe." Two days later I arrived at the mission with no intention of staying clean.

What I didn't know was that it was a faith based program. I stayed closed minded at first. In my mind it was totally impossible for a being that I couldn't see, hear, feel, or make a deal with to ever help me .

 Twenty days into my stay (the longest time I had clean without being locked up) I met with the director of spiritual development, Lynn Samaan. She explained the concept of spirituality to me. I began to attend the church service here at the mission to build a relationship with my high power. It was what I needed to fill "the void." I began to smile and gain faith that my life was going to get better. I felt great!

Due to my past while I was in active addiction, I had to serve a small prison term. I left the mission with nine months clean--a true miracle and gift from god!

I knew on my way to prison that god wanted to mold me some more. I was not angry only very thankful to the mission for standing behind me on my road to recovery. The mission and its staff played a huge role in planting my seed of faith.

After serving my time I started to fall back into my old ways. I stopped praying and going to meetings. It wasn't long before I used and overdosed. Being on probation, that was a violation. I was told to return to a program or go to prison.

Thirty days into my stay back at the Mission my father died. What an excuse to get high. The staff here worked with me to help me through this painful time. I took over my fathers company and work every day to resume my position in society.

Had it not been for the positive environment that lives at the Mission I am not sure I would be alive to write my story.   

My name is Nancy. I was homeless and living on the streets of Boston year round for almost 20 years!

I lived to drink in order to numb the emotional pain and sadness I was feeling.

Every morning when I woke up on the streets it was the same � I would be shaking violently; I would throw up whatever was in me, but more often than not I had the dry heaves, because there was nothing in me. I was empty physically, but I was also empty emotionally and spiritually.

Then God intervened in my life through the staff of the Boston Rescue Mission.

I was a walking dead person with no good feelings and now I am alive and filled with joy.

The Mission has shown me responsible love. They have helped me to structure my life and to find value in who I am. They have spent many hours counseling me and just as many praying for me.

Now I wake up happy; I wake with a purpose for living. I want to help others who are homeless find what I have received here. It gives me no greater joy than to give back in this way.

I want to thank the donors of the Boston Rescue Mission for not only helping to make a huge difference in my life, but also in the lives of my children, grandchildren and mother. Now they have a mother, grandmother and daughter who can really be there for them.

God has lifted me out of the miry clay and set my feet on solid ground. Thank you Jesus!

My name is Billy O.

My parents were absent from my life growing up--my father to his military career and my mother to the bottle of vodka. By age 12, I was a veteran street survivor.

I overcame my lost childhood and immersed myself in the pursuit of material things. I worked as a respiratory therapist; I ran a thriving antique business and helped to organize a successful political campaign. Outwardly, it appeared that I had achieved the American Dream.

But, all the while, I was masking my lifetime of hurts � first through the use of alcohol and grass, but eventually with heroin and cocaine. I ultimately lost everything to my addictions and ended living in numerous halfway houses and shelters. It came to the point where I hoped my next fix of cocaine would kill me.

Then God's providential love brought me to Boston Rescue Mission's Kingston House.

I met with Lynn, the Mission's chaplain, and her kind and peaceful spirit lead me to finding a loving and caring God.

As a child my heart hardened toward God and I became unable to love myself. Here I found a God who had been with me the whole time, who felt my hurt and loves me unconditionally. He softened my heart and where there was once darkness in my heart, God's light now shines.

I want to thank the Mission donors for making it possible for me to find, for the first time in my life, a sense of peace and serenity and for giving me back my life. I'm not the man I was and that's a very good thing!

I'm cautiously optimistic, but I know, with God's strength and presence in my life, I have the ability to overcome all things!

My name is JoAnne. You could say I'm the product of a neglectful mother, an absentee father, and cruel foster parents. At 5 years old, social workers moved my lice-infested and malnourished sister and I from a nasty apartment to a foster home where I was regularly beaten and sexually abused for many more years. At 20, I was drinking, doing crack, and living on the streets of Boston with some very dangerous people. I then found myself pregnant and very scared.

For the next 25 years, I moved all over, bearing the shame and guilt of being a foster child, a welfare mother, a battered woman, and struggling with chronic instability and homelessness. To top it off, I was passing on many of these problems to my children. Finally, I heard the call to commit myself to God and prayed for guidance. The Lord led me across the country back home to the Boston Rescue Mission.

This is a center that Jesus fills with people of really authentic faith. I see God working through the people living here, the staff and the volunteers-they walk the walk, and are showing me how to do the same. Through my work at the Kingston House, God has helped me to forgive my family and to forgive myself. I'm learning how to speak boldly, but from a place of love, because I want to become an advocate for those that have been thrown away. When the presence of the Lord is here, there's a difference. I think you should call it "The King's House"!

My name is Cheryl. For almost 25 years I've been running away from all that has disabled me from living my life to the fullest. It has been a progressive run that has taken me from raiding my parent's liquor cabinet at 15 for my first drink to shooting up heroin at age 37.

I grew up in a chaotic household, with parents who were alcoholics. As a child I walked through life on eggshells, seeking approval from parents who could not give it; I didn't know who I was or what I was going to do with my life. In spite of these things I was living a fairly normal life, until it all came crashing down at age 35. In quick succession my hip broke while I was running one day: my boyfriend fatally overdosed; and my mother died. Five years later, I hit bottom when I was arrested for drug possession and incarcerated.

While in jail I prayed each day that God would help me do the right thing. I knew about the Boston Rescue Mission's Kingston House and knew their program was what I needed. On March 23^rd of this year, my prayers were answered and I came to the Mission. I was so delighted!

At the Mission my life has been transformed � my self-esteem has been restored, I found a community that is now my family, and a God that will always be with me and never leave me feeling alone.

On September 27^th, I received an early Christmas present, when I had my hip repaired �this has always been a huge obstacle for me to over come. Finally, I want to thank you, who support the Mission, for helping me to find that I can now live life clean and sober, and live life to its fullest.

But in 1983 when my mother died, I didn't know how to handle my sadness and the downward spiral began. My drug abuse set off an abusive and defiant personality. I resented authority and wouldn't take advice; I was going to do things my way! Eventually the darkness in my life overwhelmed any good I was trying to do.

After years of running from my issues, I was given the undeserved gift of a second chance from God through the Boston Rescue Mission. Here I found people who really cared for me; they provided structure and support and most significantly I rediscovered that I was very important to God!

As we near Christmas I want to thank the donors of the Boston Rescue Mission for giving me the best gift of all, the gift of life. I feel restored as a good father and husband to my family. May God's Peace be yours as it is mine!

My name is Erica. At 19 I lost my life to heroin, and for six years I forgot what life could be like. As a teen I drank but I never considered using drugs, until one fateful day when I began my slide into drug addiction. First it was pain pills, then it was ecstasy, and finally heroin. It was awful, but I was trapped.

The addiction controlled my life, all my energy went into getting the money I needed to obtain that next fix of heroin. I went from job to job and from one living situation to another. I had burned, it seemed, all my bridges to help. I was sick, I had lost another job, and I had no place to stay. Then God intervened in my life through my sister, to find the money, to buy the bus ticket, to get me to Boston!

I came into the Boston Rescue Mission's recovery program and God was the furthest thing from my mind. As a child I had learned to fear God, but at the Mission I found a God who loved me no matter how bad I had been. He was willing to forgive me and I found out he wanted the best for me in my life. I never before understood how much God loved me! I found a reason for living!

Now I hold a fulltime job, have a place of my own and I was able to successfully complete the Boston Marathon! I want to thank each and every donor who through their gifts, both big and small, made a difference in my life and in so many others. Your gift said to me that even though I had made destructive choices in the past, I can still hope for a brighter future. Thanks for believing in me; now I have a better life, and I have hope!

My name is Reinaldo. I'm an addict from the South Bronx in New York City. I didn't like myself, my life was chaos, I had no sense of direction or purpose and I was losing my battle with life until I was rescued at the Boston Rescue Mission.

For almost 20 years I lived on the streets of NYC, drinkin' and druggin'. I was without a place to sleep, I had to beg for money and I ate out of garbage cans just to stay alive. As hardened and tough as I was, many nights I can remember praying � "Please God don't wake me up in the morning, because I can't face another day of this life".

At the point of losing all hope, my sister intervened and brought me to Boston and into a Detox program. This was nothing new for me as I had been in 7 detoxes prior to this, but this time something would be different.

After detox, I came to the Boston Rescue Mission and I heard, saw and experienced things I never had been exposed to before. People genuinely cared for me. I was suspicious at first about what they wanted, but then I came to realize that they loved and accepted me just as I was.

I began to experience a sense of peace in my life as I started to read my Bible and people prayed for me. I learned that I had value in God's eyes, that He was always with me and that I was forgiven for all the wrongs I'd ever committed. For the first time in a very long time I felt good about myself.

Now I have a sense of direction for my life. I've been reunited with my 15 year old daughter. I'm close to having a place of my own and I have a goal one day of working in the area of community relations. I want to give back and serve others!

Finally, I wish I could meet, shake the hand of, and thank every donor who helped make this transformation possible in my life. Now I can't wait to wake up each morning!

My name is Pam. I'm here at the Boston Rescue Mission thanks to a program that helps women to transition from the jailhouse back into the mainstream. This is my story.

When I was young, my alcoholic mother beat and berated me regularly. She disappeared for weeks at a time until she left for good when I was six.  My father earned a comfortable income, but went binge-drinking over the weekends. I wanted for nothing that could be bought, but I adopted my mother's behavior at age twelve when I took my first drink. I dropped out of school, ran away for days to drink and smoke grass in the woods, and began mainlining heroin at age sixteen. For decades, I worked in low-paying jobs, suffered in many abusive relationships, and poisoned my body with alcohol and drugs. After finally getting caught with drugs and violating probation 29 times, they threw me in jail for several months. I felt completely empty, like a big black hole.

When I was "inside" I found God through prison ministries, and came to the Boston Rescue Mission on parole. I went through months of emotional discovery-one woman called me "Pam of many tears"-as I learned how to care about myself and others. Now I'm not afraid to feel any more; I've got the holy spirit working in me, and I look forward to working again and becoming closer to my son. I truly believe there's a halo over this house.

My name is Marty.  I've been drinking on and off throughout my adult life as a destructive response to emotional pressures. At first, I ran a carpentry business for a few years, but money problems nudged me toward many bottles on many nights after work. Eventually, after losing the business and major knee injuries brought pain and depression, I again turned to alcohol for escape. My second trip to detox marked the ending of my marriage and life at home with 4 children.

The losses continued. My mother's diabetes led to a stroke and her sudden death. In an eerie coincidence, my sister also died of a stroke near the same time. More depression and more drinking landed me in detox a third time. By then, injuries and decades of manual labor had caused chronic, debilitating pain in my knees. Walking was so difficult that I spent about 9 months in a wheelchair. Once again, alcohol became my master and I knew that this time, I needed more than just a detox--I needed some serious recovery.

I owe my future to the Boston Rescue Mission. I knew that through drinking, I let myself and my family down. Here I feel like the shame, the frustration, and the guilt of my past drinking can be forgiven-by asking for forgiveness from others, from God, and from myself. All I can do is put my best effort forward, but I've learned to put my faith in God, and that makes a difference.

My name is Mary Jane. I lived in some crazy homes as a kid. One time when I was a young girl, my parents abandoned my sister and me for two days straight. After that, I suffered with grandparents, aunts, and uncles instead. It was a scary house full of violence, sexual abuse, and crazy drunks.

As a teenager I started drinking to fit in with others. Then I drank to get through problems instead of facing them, the way my family did. As a young adult I fought to maintain a period of sobriety, but I always chose abusive partners. Once when I was six months pregnant, I got beaten up so badly that I lost the baby. Since then, I've had three heartbreaking miscarriages.

Still, I kept pressing on, and I kept getting knocked down. When I tried to confront my family with the lasting pain they had caused me, they all shut me out. That hurt so much that I turned to alcohol to escape. More drinking and more abusive relationships followed. Thank God I found a way to the Boston Rescue Mission!

After meeting with Lynn Samaan and the other residents here, I've found a lot of spiritual healing for myself. To me, that's what sets the Kingston House apart from other places. It's a loving, caring place that really gives people a chance. Now I have enough confidence to work and live independently for once. Thank you, Kingston House!

My name is Michelle. I grew up in St. Louis and started using drugs when I was a teenager. Chaos surrounded everything I did. My parents sent me to live with my aunt in Brookline, but I just found new problems there. Since coming to Boston, I've been in and out of programs, stayed in five halfway houses and lived on the streets. 

When I first came to the Kingston house I wanted to leave everyday. Eventually, I started to get involved in the spiritual retreats and chapel services and started participating in Alcoholics Anonymous. There is more spirituality and community in this house than any place I've ever been and I'm grateful for the house now and enjoy living here.

Six months ago I was a homeless junkie living outside on the streets of Boston and now I have hope for my future that I've never had before. For the first time in my life, getting high is not an option. Today I have my beautiful son back in my life, I have a job and a place to sleep and I have a relationship with God. Prayer was always a part of my life but never like this before. I used to pray to get me out of bad situations and today I simply ask God to help me stay sober one day at a time.

Hello, I'm Joe.  I grew up with my 4 younger siblings in a single parent home.  My parents divorced when I was 7, but I never really knew my father.  I followed the older kids in the neighborhood, and got into more trouble than any kid should have.

At 10, I was sent to reform school, supposedly to straighten me out. Instead, it defined a painful cycle of alcoholism, institutions and self-destruction that I continued for 30 years.  It was the only life I knew.

While serving jail time for my fourth DUI, I started thinking about change.  Every time I got out of jail, my mother greeted me with renewed hope. But every time I returned to the people I considered friends, I drank and landed back in jail.  Fortunately, someone in my unit directed me to the Boston Rescue Mission. 

I've been to just about every halfway house and detox program in the Commonwealth, but the Mission is different. Everyone helps everyone else. When I see a homeless addict coming through the line, I see myself when I was drinking.

Here I'm finally free, not just from jail, but from the pressures and notions of who I thought I was.  Now I'm learning how to relate to people outside of jail and drugs. I have better self-esteem, and I have finally validated my mother's hope. Every day I get on my knees and thank God for this place and ask for just one more sober day here.